Friday, December 7, 2012
Boundries
It is important to have strict boundaries when it comes to the in-laws. If you don't have boundaries in when they can come over, when you visit them, the things you discuss with them, the decisions that they are a deciding factor in, then it could seriously destroy your marriage. The first years are so important to a married couple and they need to figure out things for themselves. You don't have to do this in a rude way. It is just important to make boundaries and then stay strict to them. These boundaries are different for every couples. So as long as the couple decides together and comes to an agreement then it will make for a lot happier marriage!
Friday, November 30, 2012
DIVORCE
The fact that 50% of all marriages end in divorce is a myth. The truth is that 75% of couples are happily married. In 1970 there was a peak in divorce in the United States because of the No Fault Act in 1969. This act made it so that people could get divorced for no reason pretty much. 70% of Americans who divorce regretted the divorce and wish they would have tried to save their marriage. And interestingly that same number (70%) of the males remarried.
So why do people divorce? A list that we came up with in class is:
-people are set in their ways (stubborn)
-Skill sets
-it is simply an option
-kids
-finances
A prophet gave this formula for a NEVER FAILING MARRIAGE.
1= Careful selection
2=Great Unselfishness
3=Continued Courtship
These sound pretty simple, but because if stupidity and selfishness marriages fail. It is worth the extra work to keep your marriage happy!
So why do people divorce? A list that we came up with in class is:
-people are set in their ways (stubborn)
-Skill sets
-it is simply an option
-kids
-finances
A prophet gave this formula for a NEVER FAILING MARRIAGE.
1= Careful selection
2=Great Unselfishness
3=Continued Courtship
These sound pretty simple, but because if stupidity and selfishness marriages fail. It is worth the extra work to keep your marriage happy!
Friday, November 23, 2012
Purposes of Parenting
What are some of the purposes of parenting? There a 100's of answers, but I think a very important one is to teach patience. In class someone said this, " Some kids are sent to parents for the parents to learn from and some kids are sent to the parents for the kids to learn from." I thought this was really interesting because most of the time I think that parents are supposed to teach their kids everything but in reality, a lot of the times kids are the ones that teach the parents.
Who gets effected by parenting? EVERYONE! I think of having to deal with roommates who were raised differently. People you work with, live with, spend time with. The way your parents raised you effects your whole life and other people have to deal with you!
Who gets effected by parenting? EVERYONE! I think of having to deal with roommates who were raised differently. People you work with, live with, spend time with. The way your parents raised you effects your whole life and other people have to deal with you!
Friday, November 16, 2012
Compromise/Concensus
What is the difference between compromise and consensus In class we discussed this but I am not quite sure that I understand it. I am going to try my best to explain but all you readers out there are welcome to put in your input! On a compromise both parties give and take a little. A consensus is when all parties agree 100% about everything that is being decided upon. I thought this was really interesting to think about when it comes to marriage. Can you compromise God's will? I don't think so. A consensus IS Gods will. While making a consensus it is important to be very open and honest with everyone. People become whole and unifies when the come to a consensus
Friday, November 9, 2012
COMMUNICATION is KEY
Communication is SOOOO important. Not just for couples but for all members of the family. It is easier to communicate if you have shared meanings (symbolic interaction theory). Communication doesn't always come easy, it is something everyone has to work on. As silly as it sounds there is something called meta-communication which is communication about communication. I know of so many arguments that I have had with boyfriends, friends, family all because of a lack of communication. No body meant to suck at communication, but it is different for everyone. So it is okay to talk about how you like to communicate.
Friday, November 2, 2012
Physical Intimacy
Physical Intimacy is a beautiful thing. I think as members of the church sometimes we shy away from talking about it because it is saved until marriage.It is very private and sacred, but it is okay to talk about. It is important to remember that this physical intimacy is the thing that makes us closest to being like a God. Not only does it bond our bodies, but it bonds our souls together.
In class we discussed the things that make a guy sexy and things that make a girl sexy. Since the class is 90% girls we mostly talked about what makes a guy sexy. These are some of the things we came up with:
-smell
-voice
-how they act with children
-if they can cook
-when they make eye contact
-helping out around the house
-if he has a good relationship with his family
-sensitivity
-gives me a sense of safety and security
The thing that makes a girl sexy are:
-smell
-the way we dress
-hard worker
-sexual
In class we discussed the things that make a guy sexy and things that make a girl sexy. Since the class is 90% girls we mostly talked about what makes a guy sexy. These are some of the things we came up with:
-smell
-voice
-how they act with children
-if they can cook
-when they make eye contact
-helping out around the house
-if he has a good relationship with his family
-sensitivity
-gives me a sense of safety and security
The thing that makes a girl sexy are:
-smell
-the way we dress
-hard worker
-sexual
Friday, October 26, 2012
Bringing in the Children
Once a couple has a kid their marital happiness starts to go down. It is not that they are miserable, but they both become more distracted from each other. They now have this other person that they have to take care of. The father could become more busy with jobs to financially provide for the child. The mom will become more busy with taking care of and nurturing the child. With every child that comes this happiness in marriage continually decreases. It is important to keep a marriage strong and still be romantic with each other.
Friday, October 19, 2012
DATING
In class we talked about the filters of finding a date. Some of these filters may not even be made consciously. The first filter is propinquity. This is people who live near us or are close to us in some setting. We tend not to date people who live far away or are from a different setting. I think this is because it is hard once you get married if you have to travel a long ways in between families. Its just easier if you spouse and you come from around the same place. Also you are more likely to find these people for obvious reasons. The second filter is attractiveness. Well duh! You have to have that initial physical attraction before you want to spend time with them. They don't have to be drop dead sexy but there needs to be an attraction between the two people. The third filter is similarities. It is important to want to do the same things. You don't have to have everything in common, but it is important to have some similarities so you can share some interests!
Friday, October 12, 2012
Purposes of the Family
Social class has an interesting influence on the purposes of the family. But first what are the purposes of the family. I think that they are: to bring to pass Heavenly Fathers plan; bring children into the world; provide structure for children; contribute to society; help children establish expectations and hopes; offer love and support; and the list could go on and on! So, how does the social class influence these things? Studies show that lower class people tend to get pregnant out of wedlock more often. This situation alone effects many of the purposes of the family. It is hard to provide structure and support as a single parent.
In class I heard an interesting saying that goes like this "One of the best ways to ensure no poverty is to have a father in the home." Most times men have this drive and known responsibility inside of them to provide for the family. I thought that was really interesting!
In class I heard an interesting saying that goes like this "One of the best ways to ensure no poverty is to have a father in the home." Most times men have this drive and known responsibility inside of them to provide for the family. I thought that was really interesting!
Sunday, September 30, 2012
THEORIES
There are four theories that family can be systemed by. Systems theory, Exchange theory, Symbolic Interaction theory, and conflict theory. Its not that families are ruled by only one system, I think it is a combination of all these theories, just at different times and situations. For me personally I think the symbolic interactions theory is so interesting. Every symbol can mean something totally different to other people. I think a lot of conflict could be solved if we just told others how you feel or what it means to you when they do or say a certain things. An example that comes to mind is a friend who got really mad at her boyfriend for opening doors for her. I thought it was really sweet and gentlemen like for him to do this but she hated it because it made her feel like he thought she was "fragile" and couldn't handle things on her own. It all depends on the way you were raised and your perspective of certain actions.
Tuesday, September 25, 2012
TRENDS
So there are some interesting trends going on in the world today related to families. These trends can be kind of scary to and quite sad to think of. Some people say that it is just how the world is today and times have changed. But I personally think it is sad. The rates of birth to unwed mothers are increasing. The rates of single moms working, prolonged marriage, cohabitation are all increasing. Do you think this is a bad thing or just "way things are these days?"
Saturday, September 22, 2012
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